Breaking: Heineken tastes like sewage

". ." (xllx)
04/19/2016 at 21:42 • Filed to: None

Just cracked open a bottle after having some decent beer. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww...

DISCUSSION (24)

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > . .
04/19/2016 at 21:43

Yup

ttyymmnn > . .
04/19/2016 at 21:52

http://oppositelock.kinja.com/heineken-12639…

jkm7680 > . .
04/19/2016 at 21:52

That’s because IT IS sewage.

PorkchoPlissken > . .
04/19/2016 at 21:53

Not breaking at all.

Birddog > . .
04/19/2016 at 21:54

The only beer where Skunky describes not only the smell but the flavor.

Did nobody warn you?

. . > Birddog
04/19/2016 at 21:58

I’ve had it multiple times before, but always in isolation. Never had it following a real beer.

. . > ttyymmnn
04/19/2016 at 21:58

I drink it because that’s all they had at the petrol station I visited to stock up at. :(

Svend > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:04

We’ve just got Guinness’s new beer (lager) in store. It’s called ‘HOP 13' which I’ll be buying some to try in a few hours when I finish work. I’m not a lager drinker but I do like Guinness and want to give it a go.

It’s 4x330ml bottles for Ł4 with a free glass.

. . > Svend
04/19/2016 at 22:05

I have a love-hate relationship with Guinness. I alternate between really enjoying it and really hating it.

Carbon Fiber Sasquatch > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:11

Ah Heineken, pre-skunked for your pleasure!

Svend > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:12

I like Guinness Draught, Original, Original XX, Dublin Porter and Blonde Ale but I can’t get away with the West Indies Porter. It’s just way too chocolatey.

Rico > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:15

It smells like sour too lol

ttyymmnn > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:16

I’m not a big fan of American beer, and if Heineken is the only non-US beer on offer, I’ll buy it. But it’s not a first choice.

d15b > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:26

I’m trying to build up a stock of beer.

I have:

3 Pacificos

3 Lagunitas Under Cover Investigation

3 Bear Republic Hot Rod Rye

TheDutchTexan > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:34

BLASPHEMY!

I like Shiner better than Heineken... Guess I am a blasphemer too... The worst kind... because I am Dutch...

Cash Rewards > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:51

In a similar way, my friend did a blind taste test of broken beers, including Newcastle. I think the others were Brooklyn Brown, dogfish head’s brown, and a fourth I don’t remember. Newcastle is terrible.

Goggles Pizzano > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:52

Agreed. Try having a Beck’s first. Makes Heineken taste like heaven in comparison.

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > . .
04/19/2016 at 22:59

What I wouldn’t do for a Heineken these days...

On Thursdays I head over to a local pub with a friend of mine for some drinking, billiards and darts. I’m unemployed and he’s on disability so there’s not a lot of cash between the two of us, and usually he pays. We go on Thursdays because after 10:00 you can get a bucket (6 bottles) of Pabst Blue Ribbon for $6. Sadly, I’m becoming accustomed to the taste. It’s like college all over again - shit beer and lots of it. Yes, as a matter of fact, he is an alcoholic. There’s so much good stuff on tap at this pub and yet we’re drinking crap. Maybe if I can scrounge up a few bucks I’ll buy a real beer this week to get that icky PBR taste out of my mouth.

Contrast this with another friend that I visited last night. He’s got a small child now, so going out to a bar is out of the question even when his wife is in town (she’s a pilot). Instead, we head out to the patio for a good cigar and some bourbon; lately it’s been Elijah Craig 12 Year Old, pretty good stuff for the price. It was 75 degrees out last night so we put on some good jazz and had a nice cigar and a fine drink - a nice way to spend a few hours.

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > . .
04/19/2016 at 23:17

Actually, it tastes like my best friend’s dog’s farts smell. But yeah, still not good.

Stef Schrader > . .
04/20/2016 at 00:25

This is the truth.

LOREM IPSUM > . .
04/20/2016 at 00:25

Ever had a Heineken Dark?

Surprisingly 100% better than the original. Smooth, tasty, and completely unavailable in Canada... unfortunately.

Hoccy > . .
04/20/2016 at 01:33

It’s a reason why I’ve never had a Heineken since high school..

BiTurbo228 - Dr Frankenstein of Spitfires > . .
04/20/2016 at 04:55

It’s my opinion that all Lager actually tastes terrible.

When you chill something, you reduce how much you can taste it. Therefore, anything that has to be chilled to be palatable actually tastes like crap, you just can’t taste it when it’s cold.

. . > LOREM IPSUM
04/20/2016 at 07:16

Never seen it, presumably they don’t sell it here either.